The Impenetrable Barrier

Once again the Missouri Tigers failed in an attempt to get to college basketball's Final Four. I can't thank them enough.

I was starting to like college basketball. Thanks to an inevitable cold streak by the Tiger shooters on Saturday, UConn won and moved on to another national championship. I'll just give it to them since I don't want to watch any more and it's possible that the program is going on probation anyway.

I can't be dangerously spreading my sports love like this. I'll follow Missouri when the basketball, or more rarely, the baseball team does well. Other than that, it's a football-only zone. And since no one outside of the crazy SEC cares about spring football, I have time to relax.

The fantasy football season is never over, especially when you live in the dynasty world. Our free agency period is about to end, which means the draft is about a month away. I attempted to rectify my horrible situation at DE, WR, and backup QB. Seeing that I'm somewhat excited by adding Kregg Lumpkin, Danny Ware (viva los former Georgia RBs), Lamont Jordan, and retaining Maurice and Sammy Morris, yep, it's the offseason. I paid too much for Luke McCown, a spot-holder QB if I've ever seen one. I did get long-term projects Dennis Dixon and Troy Smith. They have similar games and Seneca Wallace ceilings. Ray Edwards, Charles Johnson, and Lawrence Jackson are the defensive ends with potential. When a "stud" DE gets 60 tackles, you know that it's not the most critical position to target.

Missouri/Memphis second half

Missouri starts the second half with an offensive rebound and a score. 51-36.

I read an article stating that during the peak of Arkansas "40 minutes of hell" basketball, the team had only one NBA first-round draft pick. Missouri could be that kind of team.

Wow. A turnover leads to another Missouri score. It's a 17-point lead. Now it's 19.

The lead peaks at 24. Then Memphis scores eight in a row and keeps drawing fouls. This game is far from over.

I get booted form the live feed just when Missouri's starting to slow down a bit. Come on, people!

At this point Missouri doesn't have to be perfect on defense. They just need to keep scoring. Don't let Memphis get enough momentum to make a big run. Less than ten minutes to go.

Quick fantasy football dynasty question. What's a better investment, David Clowney or Chansi Stuckey? I lost an auction for Stuckey but got Clowney uncontested a couple of weeks ago. Torry Holt is my best receiver in this league. Can you say desperate?

Missouri's giving up two pointers but no threes in this rally. The lead's getting uncomfortably close to 10.

Crap. DeMarre Carrol just got his fourth foul. Geez, Memphis is already in the double bonus. Thank you, another missed free throw. Why don't teams work on free throws more?

It's another technical foul on Memphis. Make these free throws. How does a guy from Baltimore end up going to Missouri? Come on, 15-point lead with the ball and eight minutes to go. English could have made an easy pass and got an offensive foul.

Both these teams are fearless inside the paint.

Memphis has scored too many easy baskets this half. If Missouri wins, they are going to do it by the skin of their teeth.

All Missouri needs to do is get a couple of first downs. D'oh.

Memphis attempted their first three in a long time. Luckily it rimmed out. Missouri can't make a shot but they're drawing fouls.

Zaire Taylor has an opportunity for a three-point play. We're at the four-minute timeout. I'm going to be a sleepy boy tomorrow.

Memphis got the lead to six but Missouri takes it back to eight with two minutes to go.

Funky stat of the game: Memphis tried three three-pointers in the second half. They didn't make one. Carroll missed a chance to make it a 10-point game.

It's so weird that Memphis can get easy shots in the lane but no good looks from three-point land. Can we just make some free throws? This game should be over.

Tyreke Evans is sick. Missouri gives up their 40th layup of the half. It's all good. The lead is still more than two possessions.

81 seconds to go. Just make your stinking free throws. The lead's 10 and it's all but over.

72 seconds to go. The lead is 11. Memphis makes a quick three.

65 seconds to go. OK, 63 seconds to go. It could be a two-score game. It is.

58.9 seconds to go. Players are fouling out for Memphis. That's Roburt with a "u".

50.9 seconds to go. Another missed three for Memphis and Leo Lyons fouls out. There are too many clock stoppages. Let them play!

Memphis makes one free throw and somehow bumping the Missouri player doesn't count. Memphis missed another three pointer.

40.6 seconds to go. This has been an ugly minute of missed free throws and long shots. Another Memphis player fouls out. I'm trying to make this blog seem as endless as the finish of this game.

Missouri breaks 100. Memphis missed another three and it's over, folks.

Can Missouri get to the Final Four for the first time ever? We'll find out on Saturday night. Thank you. Good night.

Missouri/Memphis first half

Levance Fields is a man. Trailing by two points with less than a minute to go, he took a 25-foot shot with a man in his face. Nothing but net. Then he gets the steal and the layup to help put the game away. Pitt's in the Elite Eight. I hope Missouri follows suit.

This is Missouri's first 30-win team. So even without another victory they're going to be one of the best teams in program history.

Missouri/Memphis starts out because it's the only game on. I'm sure that Duke/Villanova will dominate the national coverage. Missouri's wearing the old gold that I like. Why did the football team go with the urine-colored jerseys? Gold is better than yellow. I'll stop there. It's 2-0, so at least the Tigers of Missouri will have a lead.

I saw the report that Chase Patton looked more like an NFL-ready QB than Chase Daniel during Missouri's Pro Day. Ruh roh.

Hmm. . . looks like the Web feed is behind the TV feed.

Do other college athletes have as many tattoos as basketball players? It's extra noticeable for basketball players.

I was forced to go to Web video thanks to the start of Villanova/Duke.

I have to say, I usually can't watch basketball but this game is so fast paced that I can keep up. Memphis's freshman point guard is an athletic freak. Memphis used all of its salary cap on the basketball team. You get more bang for your buck out of basketball players.

Think about it this way. The football Conference USA champion lost to a 6-6 Kentucky team in their bowl game. The basketball Conference USA champ should have won the national title last year and has a 27-game winning streak this year.

Uh oh. It's 25-21. Anderson calls a good time-out.

Yep, the national feed is showing only highlights. I predict a Missouri three-pointer in a moment. Uncovered, baby.

Three three pointers in a row. Come on, I need to catch my breath here.

I love it how they need a disclaimer for a commercial featuring a guy who flies out of an airplane in a shopping cart, then rides the shopping cart down the road against traffic between two eighteen-wheelers. That is not on my bucket list.

Watching this game on my new 22-inch widescreen monitor = priceless.

One downside of the press is that Missouri gets called for a ton of fouls.

I can never feel safe with a Missouri lead. They have to be perfect.

If Mike Anderson were a football coach, I doubt that he would ever go into a prevent defense. It's a good thing that SEC schools don't care about basketball or he'd be so gone. He deserves Pinkel money since he's actually won a conference title.

J.T. Tiller is playing out of his gourd. He looked tired by hitting the front of the rim on his second free throw.

It's a three-pointer for a 13-point Tiger de Missouri lead. Ugh, the refs call it a two. There are much fewer of these calls in a basketball game as opposed to football.

I was pissed that the refs kept the clock going after a late Memphis field goal. Then Missouri hit a 65-foot shot at the buzzer. It's 49-36 at the half.

The Sox have a brand new bag

I wasn't thrilled when the Sox announced that Chris Getz was going to be the opening-day starting second baseman. After looking at his AAA stats, I feel somewhat better. He has double-digit power and speed and actually takes a walk. You could be looking at the leadoff guy. I forgot about Getz as a prospect when he repeated AA in 2007. He did go straight from 55 games at low A ball to AA, so a slow year wasn't unexpected. The White Sox are the least heralded division champ from 2008, and for good reason. I feel like one question mark position shouldn't be an issue anymore.

If Getz falters, Gordon Beckham will be next. He's the hot-shot prospect number one draft pick who will start the year in AA and play shortstop. Alexei Ramirez looks like the long-term shortstop so Getz better not look too closely into the rear-view mirror.

Any team depending on Bartolo Colon or Jose Contreras has the right to be worried. Brian Anderson, a former first-round pick who can play first-round defense in center field but is a AAAA guy at best at the plate, might be the final offensive starter. Between him, Jerry Owens, and DeWayne Wise, I'm hoping that Jordan Danks develops quicker than expected.

Other than getting compensatory draft picks at the bottom of the fourth through seventh rounds, the Titans are quiet lately.

On a personal note, I love eating Thai food that makes me sweat.

Second Verse

They've still shown less than two minutes of the Missouri game on the national CBS feed. Actually every other game has been pretty good as well. Siena's beating Louisville by four. Michigan State leads USC by 2 with 3 minutes to go. Missouri's losing by one, and is trying to blow it from what I see on the gamecast.

Can we lobby the NCAA to never send us to Boise again? Marquette just made a three pointer with less than two minutes to go. It was a three point play. Marquette has now attempted 31 free throws to Missouri's 13.

Missouri cuts the lead to two. Marquette tries a desperation three pointer. Shot clock expires, which is good because a player was there for the put-back. Now they should get the ball with a chance to tie or take the lead. Less than a minute to go and they go back to Louisville/Siena. That's it. I'm not watching Two and a Half Men ever again.

Off camera, Missouri gets a three point play. It's 79-78. There are 38 seconds to go. CBS paid a billion dollars for this? Missouri's called for a foul. I guess it's good because it gives Missouri the last shot. First free throw is missed. A tie makes this even better. Marquette makes the second shot.

Missouri runs the clock down and freshman Kim English drives. He draws the foul but the shot rims out. This is where old Missouri bricks the shots. New Missouri doesn't. It's 81-79 with 5.5 seconds left.

This is where CBS has to show the Tyus Edney shot. Thanks, guys.

The announcers say that Missouri's full-court press could lead to an open shot. A moment later, the inbounds guy runs to his right and steps forward before releasing the ball. Yep, he stepped over the line. It's a turnover. Missouri gets the ball, makes the free throws, and it's game over. Buzz Williams, the shaved head look can look good, but not on you.

See you in Glendale.

CBS hates Missouri

So, I got online, hoping to watch Missouri since CBS hates the Tigers. In the first round, CBS showed about eight seconds of the Missouri/Cornell game. Hey, it was a blowout. They showed plenty of blowouts. I nearly gouged out my eyes watching the Pitt/ETSU game, as it played out like a play-in game rather than a 1/16 game.

I figured that in the second round that Missouri would get some face time, as their matchup was the closest, seed-wise, of the three 5 p.m. games. No dice. They've showed 45 seconds of the game. I tried to download the streaming player and I was rejected on two browsers. I downloaded a bunch of crap that wouldn't work. Marquette led 17-11 at one point but Missouri has outscored them 35-15 since. I guess if Missouri makes the Final Four, they will show reruns of the Mentalist instead.

Strange stats from the first half: Missouri's shooting 53% and Marquette's shooting 32%. OK, that's not weird. Marquette has 18 free throws attempted and Missouri has five. Missouri does have five three-pointers while Marquette has two. Sadly, that's all I have to say. I'm trying to like basketball; I really am. I loved the buzzer-beaters on Friday night. Yesterday games were wall-to-wall borefests until the end of the Western Kentucky/Gonzaga game. At the rate we're going, Arizona's going to be the only Sweet 16 sleeper. I thought there was parity. Every higher seed has won in this round so far.

Unless Marquette flew in Tyus Edney, I feel comfortable about Missouri pulling this one out. Memphis next week's going to be rough. Maybe I can catch that one on local radio.

Bring on the Student-Athletes

The largest tournament involving amateur athletes in the world begins tomorrow. Butler versus LSU, a solid mid-major versus big conference showdown, begins the dance. I'll watch on my work-supplied big screen, so don't expect it to be a productive afternoon.

Every player on the U.S. World Baseball Classic team seems to be injured. I have a feeling that no one save minor leaguers who have no chance of making the opening day roster will be on the next squad. Hey, when the Olympics are on, we send minor leaguers. Why the heck not?

I enjoyed this week's Sports Guy blog featuring Michael Lombardi. The Jay Cutler situation is not improving. I don't see why 2/3 of the teams in the league aren't moving heaven and earth to get him. I know the Titans offered Collins the starting job. Give him the starting job in Denver and move the 30th pick in the first round. I know it's not going to happen. Could you imagine Vince Young as the backup to Cutler? Like I said, not going to happen.

It was ironic that Chris Carr replaces Samari Rolle in Baltimore. Carr was an underrated returner, managing to lead the NFL in kickoff return average despite not scoring a single touchdown. Also, with Carr and Eric King elsewhere, cornerback is a much bigger need in the draft. There's no depth.

Off the Field

The NFL's offseason, or non-playing season, has become an industry. There are dozens of sites devoted to the NFL draft, and any site that covers the league does not slow down, even in the tortoise-paced weeks after the initial free agent spending spree.

Interesting news from the past week:

Donte Stallworth killed a pedestrian yesterday morning in Miami. I thought it was funny that ESPN referred to him as a star player, although he is paid like one. Nothing else about the story is funny. No charges have been filed, so it probably just was a horrible accident.

Albert Haynesworth was indicted for a traffic incident from last December. I doubt that much will come to this, except a small percentage of his signing bonus going to the guy he hit. Don't expect a suspension. In the NFL, misdemeanor means "no big deal".

The Titans were on the verge of trading for Torry Holt. Holt didn't want his deal restructured, so the Rams cut him. Holt in a Titans uniform would be nice. Even with a crappy (by his standards) 64-catch season, Holt would be a huge addition to the Titans. I would even forgive him by leaving my z34 team without one decent receiver last year.

Matt Jones drank a beer. It might have been the most expensive beer in his life, as he ended up in jail and probably will be released from the Jaguars soon. Will the Jags ever draft a receiver in the first round again?

Team USA lost in the World Baseball Classic. The World Cup is a big deal and you almost never see players skipping because of pressure from their professional team. No other sport is like that. This classic is a made up event that isn't going to further interest in the sport at all. If you care more about players from "your" team getting hurt in the event, it's not an event.

I will finish with a shout out to Cheeseburger Gothic, John Birmingham's blog. Birmingham posted a comment about the blog I wrote on his latest book. I'm guessing that if I listed the last 50 books I read that none of the authors would respond like this. Those Australians aren't as bad as they are portrayed in Flight of the Conchords.

So kudos to Mr. Birmingham. Buy his book so he can take his son out to the chocolate fountain again.

Missou-rah

I thought the "Mizzou" on the front of the University of Missouri basketball jerseys didn't look right. Then I saw the "El Heat" jerseys that Miami's NBA franchise wear. Whatever works, I guess.

Missouri won a championship in basketball that the more ballyhooed football program could not corral. Their 40 minutes of hell style of full-court defense wore down Baylor. We can't get too excited, as Missouri beat teams who finished 12th, 7th, and 9th in the conference respectively to win the title. That has to be one of the weakest fields faced in conference tournament history. Let's give credit here. Mike Anderson finally got "his" players in the system and Missouri's probably going to be a 3 seed in the tournament. They will be favorites to get to the Sweet 16 and reach 30 wins. I still can't name a player on the team. I did enjoy watching them play while eating Greek food, including about a pound of stupidly tasty potatoes.

I just hope their first-round game isn't during work time next week. Between St. Patrick's Day and the NCAA first round, there are going to be a few "interruptions".

Zach's Book Review: Without Warning

Many of the positive reviews for John Birmingham's Without Warning reference Tom Clancy. I enjoyed Clancy's work before he went into semi-retirement. Debt of Honor had the famous and sadly prescient scene at the end when an airliner crashes into the Capitol building, obliterating the government.

Without Warning takes things a few steps further. The premise is that an energy wave, never adequately explained as the inciting incident, that wipes out most of the North American continent. Within the wave, there are no survivors. The book is set at the beginning of the Iraq war in 2003, so most of the U.S. military is overseas. What happens when all that remains of the U.S. is Hawaii, Alaska, and a small sliver of Washington state, including Seattle? The world slips into chaos. Fires set in the unpopulated part of the continent cause toxic rain throughout the Northern Hemisphere. France falls into civil war. Israel is alone in the Middle East.

The strength of the book is the fast plot and the well drawn characters. The book focuses on protagonists, including a group of smugglers, a city engineer in Seattle, the U.S. general in charge of Guantanamo Bay, and a spy in deep cover. Birmingham has an encyclopedic knowledge of military hardware.

I read the book in less than a week. It helped to contrast the goings-on in this world with the issues in ours.

I highly recommend Without Warning if you want a fast read of a world gone mad. Of course there's going to be a sequel.

Room for Failure

I've been a bad Commish lately. I organized the first fantasy football league that I ever joined, but after that I took an owner-only role until Zealots 34 formed in 2005. The league is now in its fifth year. In these years, I have yet to master the complicated free agent process.

It's a bit of a hybrid league in that it's mainly draft-based except when it comes to free agency. The majority of your zbucks goes to keeping your "restricted" free agents. It used to be the responsibility of my deadbeat vice commish (the truth hurts), but I decided to take it over this year.

Early in the process Brett Ratliff took over the top spot as the highest paid free agent ever. He went for z7200. Early Doucet, a second-round pick for the Cardinals who didn't crack the teams top four this year, beat Ratliff. The final bid was z13900. One team pulled a Dan Snyder thinking that Doucet might be the slot guy this year, or maybe even an eventual starter if Steve Breaston falters.

The "Houston, we have a problem" moment came when one of our owners noticed that in setting up the auction process, I had neglected to set the system up to automatically deduct zbucks as owners won players. The owner who won Doucet didn't have the cash to make the transaction. It turned out that the runner-up also was overcredited by an embarrassing 10,000 zbucks. Not my finest moment. This disaster happened on a day when I did not check the Web. I spent a couple of Sunday hours getting things organized, and so far, there have been no complaints.

I have a problem with failure. I feel that I have no room for failure, and I will be dismissed if I make but one mistake. I also don't like to own up when I do fail.

I'll be back in a sec for Zach's book review.

Think Your Team is a Choker?

After reading about Missouri's somewhat unlikely victory over Oklahoma last night, it's time to talk NCAA tournament. When it comes to Missouri's NCAA history, I assumed that they had just as many tourney chokes as anyone else. I was wrong. Missouri's like the Chicago Cubs of the NCAA tournament.

Sadly I haven't found a site like the wonderful all-time NCAA football records page for college basketball. I had to go to various sources to learn the following details. Missouri has a 14-19 all-time NCAA record, which is 6th worst all time. In 1987 and 1990 Missouri lost as a 4 and a 3 seed, respectively. Norm Stewart has the worst winning percentage all time (12-16) as a coach in the tourney. This year Missouri will be the all-time leader in tournament visits without a Final Four appearance (19 going on 20).

The Titans proved that they were paying attention in free agency by signing Nate Washington and Jovan Haye. Washington was the third wideout for the Super Bowl champ Steelers and hopefully will have a better tenure than former free agent flameouts Yancey Thigpen, Carl Pickens, and David Givens. Haye will not replace Albert Haynesworth as much as he will round out the DT rotation. He's more of a pass rusher, so I expect Jason Jones to start.

Finally, I acquired the third Green Sox hat in my White Sox cheering career. I first saw the green sox hat during a televised St. Patrick's Day game when I was in college. Scott Ruffcorn was the hot prospect then. Ruffcorn was a first-round draft pick who never won a major league game.

The Sox were one of the first teams to wear the specialized gear. Now every team has a version.

Zach's Book Review

This will be the first in a series of book reviews. Books come in many categories. There are books you like but have to labor through, books you just plain don't dig, and books that you read like there is no other task in your life. Over the past three weeks, I've had two of those books.

The first was Born Standing Up by Steve Martin. It's a breezy read about Martin's years as a stand-up comedian. It's strange to see him today as a quasi intellectual, until you get into his movie roles. Martin spent years perfecting his craft, and it made me think of Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers and the magic 10,000 hours a person puts into his or her career before becoming a master. Martin did the time, and at the point that he finally reached fame, he decided that he didn't want it anymore. He left standup at the right time, gave a classic performance in The Jerk, and the rest is history. Now he does horrible movies to finance his art collection.

I just finished a much more sober read about a comedian who never completely tapped his potential. The Chris Farley Show is a downer. It's not the fault of his brother Tom, who co-wrote the book. Instead of a traditional narrative, 95% of the book is taken directly from interviews of his friends, family, and colleagues. Everyone who met him was touched by the innocence behind his manic stage presence. The downfall of his incredible comedic gifts was his addictive personality. He discovered alcohol at age 17 and immediately got smashed. After tasting success with Chicago's Second City and Saturday Night Live, he couldn't outlast his demons.

Farley was sober for three years, but the pressure of Beverly Hills Ninja and personal issues got him off the wagon. The tale of his last few days, a four-day drug binge that led to an overdose, is as sad as anything I can recall.

To make myself feel better, I'm going to review his interview with Paul McCartney. He's not in character in this scene.

I'm also taking a break from non-fiction with the latest novel by John Birmingham. Looks like the Titans aren't winning the Super Bowl in this one.

The Truth about Free Agency

NFL fans can't help but feel gyped when their team doesn't sign a big-time free agent in the first three days. After the Redskins signed Albert Haynesworth to a contract that was later confirmed as four years, $48 million with funny money thrown in there to dupe sportswriters, every Titan fan wanted a backfill signing. Chris Canty, formerly of the Cowboys, seemed like that guy. Thanks to some solid reporting by Peter King, we found out that Canty was the first guy on Redskins' GM Vinny Cerrato's speed dial at midnight on Saturday. After the 'Skins got their Haynesworth, Canty's agent thought the Titans would be interested. They were not.

Canty signed with the Giants, who now have two teams' worth of defensive linemen. The Titans got nothing. I expect that they'll find a relatively cheap free agent or two and it will get almost no media coverage.

What's up with the funny money love in these contracts? The 49ers signed Brandon Jones to a deal that was reported as five years, $16 million. More accurately, it looks like a three-year, $5.4 million deal, which is a lot better for a slot receiver. Hey NFL beat writers, contracts aren't guaranteed. They never have been. Stop publishing funny money deals like they are legit. Every dime of a baseball contract is guaranteed. No one cares about baseball.

I'm glad that in the midst of a rare Atlanta snowstorm, the local CBS affiliate decided to show Tennessee/Florida instead of Missouri/Kansas. Kansas is one of those basketball programs that reloads instead of rebuilds. How you get really good basketball players to come to Lawrenceville, Kansas and stay without restraints is beyond me.

The Matt Cassel to KC trade is intriguing, in that reports stated the Pats would need multiple high draft picks to let him go. Then he goes to KC, where the former player guru Scott Pioli resides, with another player, for a second-round pick. Now, it is a high second round pick, and in terms of bang for your buck, a second-round NFL rookie is hard to beat. Still, it looks a little like a salary dump for the Pats. Newly hitched Tom Brady better be 100%.